think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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