Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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