She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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