Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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