It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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