wrigley field is MILF paradise
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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