If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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