put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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