How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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