you guys were way drunker than both of me
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Randomize
