Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
