no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
