Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
