I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I think I am morally bankrupt
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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