Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize