I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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