he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
This house was built for laser tag.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize