her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
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