just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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