Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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