i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize