dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
sex in a hospital.. check
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.