Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(765): View more from Indiana

that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming

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(765): that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming http://tfl.nu/05mh

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(803): View more from South Carolina

dude why did you let me call her?!

(1-803): View more from South Carolina

i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...

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(803): dude why did you let me call her?! (1-803): i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation... http://tfl.nu/4h0w

Replies (11) Good night (1056) Bad night (2581)
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(954): View more from Florida

You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.

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(954): You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone. http://tfl.nu/c0ys

Replies (33) Good night (4083) Bad night (759)
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(720): View more from Colorado

What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to

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(720): What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to http://tfl.nu/xbm0

Replies (33) Good night (1780) Bad night (4530)
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(607): View more from New York

she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.

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(607): she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet. http://tfl.nu/uotm

Replies (36) Good night (1706) Bad night (8645)
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(785): View more from Kansas

Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".

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(785): Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets". http://tfl.nu/227d

Replies (16) Good night (1235) Bad night (4565)
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(425): View more from Washington

After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.

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(425): After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake. http://tfl.nu/nvef

Replies (16) Good night (3373) Bad night (2068)
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(540): View more from Virginia

Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.

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(540): Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run. http://tfl.nu/gma4

Replies (3) Good night (2026) Bad night (699)
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(904): View more from Florida

Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.

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(904): Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time. http://tfl.nu/ddkn

Replies (4) Good night (2192) Bad night (634)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.

(678): View more from Georgia

Yea. I'm excited about this party too

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(770): Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand. (678): Yea. I'm excited about this party too http://tfl.nu/ksx0

Replies (4) Good night (2072) Bad night (573)
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(831): View more from California

I won't be able to get a boner for a month

(916): View more from California

Challenge accepted.

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(831): I won't be able to get a boner for a month (916): Challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/ivke

Replies (3) Good night (1421) Bad night (468)
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(515): View more from Iowa

Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.

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(515): Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away. http://tfl.nu/jux9

Replies (2) Good night (1244) Bad night (513)
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(714): View more from California

I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit

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(714): I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit http://tfl.nu/55p1

Replies (2) Good night (659) Bad night (371)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!

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(504): If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!! http://tfl.nu/gw9p

Replies (2) Good night (834) Bad night (435)
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(530): View more from California

hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back

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(530): hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back http://tfl.nu/8xnm

Replies (1) Good night (744) Bad night (346)

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