Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize