Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
a search helicopter?!
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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