He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
