They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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