i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
