We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
