One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
