Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
