Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
