Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize