No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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