I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
