so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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