There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
