You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
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You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
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I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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