Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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