First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize