go do what you do best...puke behind churches
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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