I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize