i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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