arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
