when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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