Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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