chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
