I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize