Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
