Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.

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  (310): she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category. http://tfl.nu/bs6u
  Replies (55) Good night (874) Bad night (11540)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know

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  (501): She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know http://tfl.nu/vx6i
  Replies (15) Good night (3469) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.

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  (701): she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends. http://tfl.nu/prst
  Replies (13) Good night (1036) Bad night (4189)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better

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  (970): There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better http://tfl.nu/7u74
  Replies (3) Good night (2566) Bad night (1323)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.

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  (314): don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again. http://tfl.nu/ygo4
  Replies (19) Good night (955) Bad night (4490)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.

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  (407): My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now. http://tfl.nu/oxop
  Replies (12) Good night (2694) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Glow parties are what I live for

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  Your priorities in life astound me

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  (204): Glow parties are what I live for (1-204): Your priorities in life astound me http://tfl.nu/wtnz
  Replies (1) Good night (1843) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.

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  (678): I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club. http://tfl.nu/jmao
  Replies (13) Good night (1140) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.

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  (573): i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man. http://tfl.nu/t42g
  Replies (2) Good night (641) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  So did he inherit the massive family cock?

  (1-317): View more from Indiana

  :(

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  (317): So did he inherit the massive family cock? (1-317): :( http://tfl.nu/a8a5
  Replies (9) Good night (644) Bad night (2230)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?

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  (780): Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat? http://tfl.nu/yo7z
  Replies (10) Good night (884) Bad night (464)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.

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  (540): By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill. http://tfl.nu/ghyy
  Replies (0) Good night (725) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone

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  (775): Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone http://tfl.nu/zeql
  Replies (7) Good night (401) Bad night (651)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.

  (714): View more from California

  Worser: she offered to clean me up

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  (714): Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted. (714): Worser: she offered to clean me up http://tfl.nu/1w2l
  Replies (11) Good night (346) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.

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  (604): We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life. http://tfl.nu/xwcn
  Replies (0) Good night (646) Bad night (205)

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