I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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