does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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